yeah I was shocked the thing didn't pop!

As an older woman (39) who is thinking of having a baby (leave it to me to leave things til the last minute) I collect these stories about difficult children. Is it a risk I'm willing to take? Do the pros outweigh the cons? Would the kid experience enough joy (despite perhaps being ill-suited to our world) to make it worth being alive? Having a difficult child would transform me, I'm sure, but would it transform me into something better?

I'm not asking you to answer those questions. that would be unfair. But I very much appreciate people like you who are willing to share their stories - smart, honest, unsentimental. Thank you.